Coping with Grief During the Holidays: Establishing New Traditions
The holiday season often magnifies both joy and grief. When you’re grieving the death of a loved one, familiar traditions can feel strange and celebrations might feel forced. Introducing gentle traditions can help you explore a new beginning while carrying your loved one’s memory into the holiday season.
Create a Small Ritual
Honoring your loved one around the holidays in small ways can make a profound impact.
Consider these simple, comforting rituals:
Light a candle before a holiday meal to remember your loved one. You could light their favorite scented candle or opt for an elegant taper or votive candle.
Place a cherished photo of your loved one in a place you’ll see it throughout the holidays.
Share a favorite story of your loved one around the dinner table.
These small moments keep your loved one’s memory close to you while making room for connection with family and friends.
Honor Your Loved One’s Favorites with a New Tradition
Traditions can always evolve, and weaving in a new tradition inspired by your loved one can help you feel connected to them while deepening your connection with those around you.
Start a new tradition inspired by something they loved:
Bake or cook their favorite recipe — use their handwritten recipe if they made one! It can be comforting to read a loved one’s writing and create something they enjoyed.
Play a song that reminds you of your loved one and invite others to sing or dance along.
If your loved one was passionate about a charitable cause or nonprofit organization, volunteer at a place they loved, and bring your family and friends along to honor your loved one’s memory.
By incorporating something your loved one enjoyed into your holiday traditions, you create a thread between past and present — one that feels grounding, with the capacity for joy and new beginnings.
Start a Comforting Activity
While you’re remembering, honoring and grieving your loved one, you also have permission to create an entirely new tradition — something that comforts you and reflects who you are now.
Here are a few ideas to start your new tradition:
Host a holiday potluck gathering with friends — a few or many — or try a new restaurant once a month with a couple close friends.
Wake up early or stay up late during a meaningful holiday to walk around your neighborhood and notice the decorations, the weather and how you’re feeling. Find more about healthy self-care in this blog post.
Write in a holiday reflection journal or start your own memory journal. Detail what you’re looking forward to around the holidays, who you’ll share them with this year and how you’re feeling about the changes — difficult and joyous — in your life.
Remember to be gentle with yourself, lean on your community and look for moments of joy. Find more ideas about creating new traditions and tips for navigating grief around the holidays in this blog post. New traditions allow you to carry your loved one with you and honor their memory — while making room for the life you’re living today.